69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
