Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
