My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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