Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize