my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
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I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
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And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
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