If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.