Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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