nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
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