The maid of honor just puked.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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