Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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