What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize