I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
You've changed since you got that strap on
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
