Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
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