Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
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