Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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