she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
