ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
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The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
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the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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