homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Randomize