Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
