omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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