Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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