oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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