I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
