ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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