so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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