just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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