Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
