what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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