Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize