Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
