i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
