Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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