Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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