Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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