Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
