lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
