In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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