Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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