Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Randomize
