An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Randomize