Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
