so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
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