The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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