i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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