the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I hate all girls vehemently.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
