I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
