he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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