There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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