I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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