I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize