phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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