drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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